Standing Alone in a Field of Tears
by CinnamonTheFabulous
Summary: "Mother, why am I different?" Beekit pondered, staring up at her mother with bright blue eyes. Flowertail bit her lip and stared straight ahead, unsure about how to answer her kit's question. That was for another time...another day... Follow Beekit as she struggles through her life in ShadowClan, living as the menace to her Clan for an unspoken reason, a reason she is hated for.
1. Cats of the Clans

Cats of the clans:

ShadowClan:

Leader: Leafstar- Handsome tabby brown tom with emerald green eyes.

Deputy: Waterfoot- Gorgeous pure white she cat with baby blue eyes; former warrior of RiverClan.

Apprentice: Lizardpaw

Medicine cat: Rowanleaf- Ginger tortoishell she-cat with dark brown stripes on forehead.

Medicine cat apprentice: Olivepaw- Dark black she-cat with emerald green eyes.

Warriors:

Snowbird- Black and white tom with incredibly strong hind legs.

Bluefeather- Russian blue tom; former medicine cat of EagleClan.

Willowgleam- Grey and white tom with orange paws.

Roseheart- Yellow she-cat with an extremely sweet temper.

Firecloud- Light orange she-cat with very long hair.

Apprentice: Grasspaw

Sootclaw- Light grey/ blue tom with white muzzle and paws.

Cloudfur- White she-cat.

Thrushfall- Light brown Bengal she-cat with dark brown flecks in fur.

Hazelfern- Hazel colored she-cat.

Marshfern- black and brown tom with long hair.

Brownclaw- Brown tom with one jet black paw.

Runningcloud- Orange and grey colored she-cat who is extremely fast.

Apprentice: Amberpaw

Pineclaw- Yellow/brownish colored tom with brown muzzle and paws.

Barkfoot- Light brown tom with big clumsy paws that resemble a dog's.

Snaketail- Orange she-cat with no fur on tail.

Treeleaf: Dark orange striped she-cat with tree-green eyes.

Frogleap- Tawny colored tom with completely black backside.

Tawnyfeather- Tawny colored she-cat with white, orange, and brown spots.

Apprentices:

Grasspaw- Light yellow she-cat with brown dots in fur.

Lizardpaw- Golden long haired tom.

Amberpaw- Amber colored she-cat with white tail and paws.

Queens and kits:

Windfur- Brown she-cat with jet black steaks of fur on tail.

(Kits: Horsekit, Icekit, Hawkkit)

Flowertail- Flowertail- Peach colored she-cat with white blotches on tail that resemble flowers.

(Kits: Olivekit, Beekit)

Badgerstripe- Black she-cat with one white stripe going all down her back.

(Kits: Toadkit, Sorrelkit)

Elders:

Greyfur- Grey tom with black ears.

ThunderClan:

Leader: Yellowstar- Brown Bengal tom with bright yellow eyes.

Deputy: Greypelt- Grey tom with white stripes all along fur.

Medicine cat: Leafwind- Light brownish black she-cat with white paws, chest, and tip of tail.

Warriors:

Morningwind- peach colored she-cat with white stripes on back, tail, and legs.

Squirreltail- Brown tom with very fluffy tail.

Apprentice: Molepaw

Foxfang- Bright yellow she-cat with large poufy tail and sharp teeth.

Apprentice: Windpaw

Largefoot- Pale tabby she-cat with abnormally large paws.

Volefur- Brown she-cat with sleek fur.

Prairiedawn- Blond she-cat with white paws.

Apprentice: Thrushpaw

Bloomtail- Red/orange she-cat with grey paws.

Oakleaf- Blue/grey tom with white paws and a white tail.

Apprentice: Birdpaw

Gingernose- White she-cat with a ginger nose.

Birdflight- Large amber tom with very powerful shoulders.

Apprentices:

Birdpaw- grey, white, and red colored tom.

Thrushpaw- Light brown tabby tom.

Windpaw- Light grey she-cat with white stripes on tail.

Molepaw- Dark brown tabby tom with grey paws.

Queens and kits:

Lilybloom- White she-cat with grey muzzle.

(Kits: Opalkit)

Elders:

Longfur- Peach and white colored tabby tom.

RiverClan:

Leader: Cherrystar- Orange/red she-cat with white paws, belly, and legs.

Deputy: Meadowtail: Golden she-cat with long fur.

Medicine cat: Acornfall- Dark brown Bengal tom with light brown flecks.

Medicine cat apprentice: Fishpaw- Blue/grey she-cat with half of a tail.

Warriors:

Fawnstep- Light brown she-cat with white spots on back.

Apprentice: Mistpaw

Mapleleaf- Dark grey tom with very long fur.

Snowflower- White/grey tom with grey tail.

Widefoot- Tawny colored tom with very wide feet.

Apprentice: Pebblepaw

Birchleaf- Dark brown she-cat with white ears.

Smallstream- Very small black she-cat with white paws. Twin of Littleriver.

Littleriver- Very small black tom with white paws. Twin of Smallstream.

Bluewater- Blue/grey she-cat with black chest.

Apprentice: Storkpaw

Maystream- pale tabby tom with striped tail and legs.

Rainfur- Blue/grey tom.

Scarnose- Very white tom with a thrashed nose.

Leopardpelt- Brown and light brown spotted she-cat.

Mossear- Black and white spotted she-cat with furry ears.

Apprentice: Loudpaw

Apprentices:

Talonpaw- Peach colored tom.

Loudpaw- Orange and white colored tom.

Pebblepaw- Light grey she-cat with white muzzle.

Storkpaw- White she-cat with black legs and paws.

Mistpaw- Misty white/grey she-cat.

Queens and kits:

Bramblefoot- Light brown she-cat.

(Kits: Brightkit, Wildkit, Windkit, Softkit)

WindClan:

Leader: Flamestar- Orange/red she-cat.

Deputy: Rabbithop- Dirty yellow tom with strong hind legs.

Apprentice: Bunnypaw

Medicine cat: Ivyvine- Brown tom with black stripes.

Warriors:

Eagletalon- Dark brown tom with white neck, legs, and tail.

Clawnose- Dark grey tabby she-cat with a clawed nose.

Ravenwind- Jet black tom.

Spottedstrom- Grey and black spotted tom with white paws.

Apprentice: Moonpaw

Firewind- Red/orange she-cat with jet black paws.

Swiftsky- White she-cat with very powerful legs and a very fast runner.

Apprentice: Lionpaw

Large-ear- Light yellow tabby tom with very large ears.

Tigerpath- Orange tabby she-cat with black stripes all over fur.

Thornfoot- Grey tom that has a broken paw, but has amazing fighting moves.

Apprentice: Leopardpaw

Skyfeather- Dark black she-cat.

Apprentice: Flowerpaw

Rocklegs- Grey tom with very stiff legs.

Apprentices:

Bunnypaw- Dusty brown she-cat.

Moonpaw- Dark grayish black she-cat with white paws.

Lionpaw- Dark golden she-cat with a long tail.

Leopardpaw- yellow and Black spotted tom with a black tail.

Flowerpaw- White she-cat with grey splotches all over fur in the shape of flowers.

Queens and Kits:

Brownpelt- Light brown she-cat.

(Kits: Daisykit, Bluekit, Whitekit, Goldkit.)

Elders:

Half-ear- Light yellow tom with half of an ear gone; former leader of EagleClan.(Original name: Halfstar.)


	2. Chapter 2: The Menace

Flowertail groaned, lying on her side with her flanks heaving. These kits were not going to come easily, as she could tell from the intensity of the pain she was currently feeling. What a horrible time to be giving birth to kittens into this world, for as new lives were coming one was being lost. She shut her eyes tight as she let out another cry. Rowanleaf stood beside her, glancing anxiously over her shoulder as her apprentice sat next to Toadstar, watching him on his deathbed, coaxing him, soothing him.

Flowertail yowled as she could feel the kits inside of her, trying and struggling to get out into the world. But she wasn't ready. Even if they were, she definitely wasn't. She was too young for this…she was too young for love, for kits, as she had only just become a warrior not even a moon ago. She opened her eyes to see Leafpelt approaching her, concern lighting his gaze.

"Leafpelt…" she moaned to her mate. "You…you should be with Toadstar…he's dying."

He leaned down and licked her on the ear. "No. I'm going to stay with you." He cringed as she cried out again.

Russetleaf leaned down and gave her some leaves, but she pushed them away. "No…" she was too weak to eat anything. All she wanted to do was to curl up in a ball and die. The first kitten came out, finally. But she wasn't done. This was just the beginning. The pain returned again.

After what seemed like hours, far after Toadstar had taken his last breath and joined StarClan, Flowertail was finished. Seven kits lay at her stomach, all dead. All born dead. There was not a single one alive. She bent her head and stared at the stars. _Why? Why, StarClan? Why must I suffer so much only to be faced with dead bodies surrounding me? _

"Flowertail!" Russetleaf's urgent call made the queen jump. "There's one alive! She's just barely…but she's breathing." The medicine cat stared rubbing her paws along the kit's pelt, a gray tabby, and Flowertail could see for herself that it was true. She had one daughter alive. This birthing wasn't in vain.

With a faint smile at knowing she had a daughter alive, she laid her head back and fell unconscious, too tired to keep her eyes open any longer.

In her dreams, she was in an empty field, with nothing in sight, nothing but the long grass hiding her from view. The sky was dark, a pitch black that had no stars and no light to shine down onto her and illuminate her pale pelt. She arched her back in fear at smelling someone approaching her.

"Who's there?" Flowertail demanded to know. "Who are you?"

A small, black cat emerged from the bushes to face Flowertail, his pelt surrounded by a starry veil, coating him like a barrier of protection. "Don't worry, Flowertail. It's only me, Sparrowpaw."

"Sparrowpaw!" Relief melted across the ShadowClan queen's gaze as she embraced her brother. He had died from a badger just two moons ago, and Flowertail still hadn't fully recovered from the tragedy.

However, Sparrowpaw pulled back and looked at her with sternness, almost a glare, in his eyes. "Flowertail, what have you done?"

The she-cat was taken aback. "I-I don't know. What did I do?"

"Your kits were never meant to happen. I thought it would be okay when they were all dead, but one of them…one of them _lived._ This never should've happened! That kit is a _curse _to ShadowClan and she should never have been born!"

Flowertail hissed. "What do you mean? No kit is a curse!"

"Oh, really?" Sparrowpaw retorted. "She has powers beyond your imagination. If her energy is not harnessed and controlled, she will kill off every cat in the forest one by one. She was supposed to be dead!"

Flowertail had no idea how to react. Her kit was a danger, a menace to the Clan? "I don't understand."

"Flowertail, she has the power to destroy anything she wants to, anything that stands in her way! While she is still young, her power will not show much, but once she is older destruction will reign not only upon ShadowClan, but upon all the Clans of the forest. She has to be killed, or she will kill all of you."

"No…no, I'm not killing my only kitten!" The pale she-cat shook her head, water welling up in her eyes and blurring her vision. "You can't make me!" Before he could stop her she bounded away from her brother into the clouding darkness, and his words followed her, echoed in her head. _"She has to be killed, or she will kill all of you." _But she didn't understand. How could one tiny kit kill an entire population of cats? Besides, it's not like she would want to. She would be raised with love and care. No one had to know she had these so-called powers. Subconsciously, Flowertail found herself promising herself and her kitten something. "I will protect you, little one. No one will harm you, I promise." She blinked and lunged forwards, as if leaping out of her dream and back into the waking world.


	3. Chapter 3: Beekit's Questions

Beekit snuggled into her mother's fur, feeling her heart thudding against her chest. Her fur was soft and warm, like always, and the flower-like spots on her tail were wavering as her tail flicked back and forth. Watching that moving tail made her smile, and want to pounce on it.

"Mother," Beekit whispered, standing up and nudging Flowertail with her head. She stepped back and ran closer, shoving up into her mother. "Wake up already!"

Flowertail groaned, shoving Beekit aside with a paw. "Go back to sleep, Beekit. It's only dawn."

Beekit whined, approaching the sleeping queen once more and pawing at her flank. "But I want to play _now._ I don't want to wait until you wake up."

"Go play with one of Badgerstripe or Windfur's kits," Flowertail moaned, blinking open one eye to stare at her daughter. "They like your company, right?"

"But Horsekit and Icekit are in the medicine cat's den with whitecough. Rowanleaf would never let me in! Hawkkit's a weirdo, so I don't want to play with him," Beekit complained, annoyed at her lazy mother who refused to get off of her bottom and come play with her only living kitten. "I wish I had my six siblings. They'd want to play with me, wouldn't they, mother?"

"Of course they would, darling." Flowertail opened both eyes and dragged herself to her paws. "What about Toadkit and Sorrelkit? Aren't they your friends?"

"Toadkit's a weirdo like Hawkkit. Toms have koodies!" She sighed, blowing out air through her bottom lip and rolling her eyes with frustration. "Besides, Windfur's too protective over Sorrelkit. She'd never let me play with her. She says I'm too dangerous, or whatever."

Tipping her head in confusion, the pale she-kit watched as her mother tensed and her lips curled a little bit.

"What's wrong, mommy?"

"Nothing, Beekit. Now, why don't you go run along and see if Rowanleaf and Olivepaw need any help with their duties?"

"Mommy, how come you're always encouraging me to go and see the medicine cat's den? I don't want to be a medicine cat." The furry kitten wrinkled her nose in disgust at the thought. "I want to be a warrior, fierce and proud like you and daddy!"

Flowertail sighed. "Well, I actually think you would enjoy being a medicine cat. I mean, you'd be safe all day, helping other cats feel better. Wouldn't you like that?"

Beekit sighed. "No. That sounds boring! Are you going to be like Windfur, overprotective of me? Just because I'm your only kit doesn't mean I'm going to die off anytime soon! Why can't you let me do what I want?"

"You'll understand when you're older, child."

"Ugh, you _always _say that!" Beekit whipped around and charged out of the den, her paws stomping on the ground with fury. "I'm going to go play with one of the _warriors _then."

Beekit squealed as she was picked up from behind. Flowertail had grabbed her scruff. "I don't think that's a good idea," the queen stated with a nervous twitch of her tail, setting Beekit down on the mossy nest beneath her.

The kit frowned. "Why not?" she growled. "Mother, why am I different? Why do you treat me differently?" Curiosity was buzzing all over her, and it was in her scent. "Why can't I play with any of the other kits or cats in the Clan? What's wrong with me?"

"Sweetie, there's…there's nothing _wrong_ with you. It's just…it's…you'll understand when you're older."


End file.
